Snapshots: My Memory Album

(See also: Why I Share: Is it Worth it?)

I can’t even begin to explain in a single sentence of why writing about my life is difficult. The “why” is complicated and messy and the reasons overlap in my mind until it’s just a muddled mess. And unless you are one of the few people who understand the sort of life I’ve lived, I might not be able to express the “why this is hard” in adequate enough words to help you understand.

Yet . . . here we are.

Me, writing. And you, reading.

So hello.

Thank you for being here.

What follows are “snapshots” of my life, written in a style that I guess you could call a “journaling” style. I share each part of my life as I feel comfortable sharing, so they probably won’t end up being in chronological order, necessarily.

As I process my memories and write them down, I may come across new information that gives me a more complete perspective; therefore, I may give minor updates to the necessary pages to reflect the new information.

Please Note: I try my best to not be too graphic in describing my past; however, if you are a survivor of abuse or mind-control programming, it may not be best to read the following material unless you are in a stable place, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Only you are best able to judge if you are in a good place, so please be judicious when reading the chapters of my bio and pay attention to how you feel when reading. If you begin to feel triggered for any reason and at any time, please stop reading and tend to your immediate needs.

❤  Loren Grace

P.S. When I originally shared some of my testimony, I used pseudonyms when referring to other people. I will again, where I’m uncomfortable naming names, but at other times, I will now use the real names of some of the people who were involved in my life.

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  1. You have a great way with words. Always awesome to read your writing. Thanks for sharing, and God Bless You for the courage to do so. Bringing much needed light to this world.


  2. I just finished reading your Snapshot #6: A Blood Contract. I am blown away by all that you wrote in #6. Much of what you wrote in the first half happened to my first wife. She passed away in 2004 from a long term illness but she did get saved before she died. We were married for 33 years and when you are with someone that long you begin to learn things. She was a very good person and a good wife and mother. What I mean is I know that much of what you describe in the first half of #6 happened to her. She had totally disassociated herself from it. I learned that too. How did I know anything about what happened to her at all? I could tell by things that happened in my own family when I was between about 4 to age 17. I remember. If you read the comments I made on your Snapshot #10, that will explain, in part. There is so much I would like to tell, but the details are just too personal to put in a public forum.
    What really blew me away was all you wrote in #6 about “Breaking the Contract,” and “The Biblical Solution.” I have never read or heard words like what you wrote before. These things you have written are exactly what I need to do! Thank you! It is so simple! For many, many years I have been on a road of back breaking complexity, trying so hard to be free from the evil bondage that has been heavily loaded on me all of my life. I am 73. When I read what you wrote, the lightbulbs came on! I get it! I have asked many other Christians, including several pastors, for help. Most of what I got always led to a complex arduous road of defeat, much of what you experienced with Duval, I think. I can now see exactly what was wrong with all of the so called “solutions” given by others. It was always some form of having to please an “angry God.” That is always what I was left with. I have learned, almost instantly, from what you wrote, that it is not like that at all. I really can see it. God loves me. I can go to Him by way of Jesus Christ, Who shed His blood for me, and God wants to help me! I will digest thoroughly what you have written and do it. Thank you so much. You have helped me more than I can describe in words.

    Liked by 1 person

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